Jeremy Clarkson Named Britain’s Sexiest Man… Again

Jeremy Clarkson is, in his own words, “unfit and fat and old.” None of this, however, has stopped him from placing at the top of a vote for the UK’s sexiest man by users of Illicit Encounters, a dating site for people seeking extramarital affairs.

The vote hardly comes from the most mainstream or arguably reliable source (the site claims that “marriages are happier as a result of affairs”, which we’re sure plenty would disagree with), but the site’s female users apparently ranked Clarkson above all of the other 49 pop culture figures included in the poll for his affair-worthiness.

It’s the second year topping the same poll for the 64-year-old car-journalist-turned-farmer. This year, he pipped actor Tom Holland to the top spot and also saw off competition from Prince William, actors Idris Elba and Ryan Reynolds, England football manager Gareth Southgate, endurance athlete Russ Cook and 2023 I’m A Celebrity winner Sam Thompson.

Clarkson will also be pleased to know (maybe) that his long-time media (and occasionally physical) sparring partner Piers Morgan dropped from 17th to 40th in the poll.

Clarkson’s success seems to be driven in part by the softer, gentler side of his personality that we see in Clarkson’s Farm, the third series of which has just been released on Prime Video. According to the Evening Standard, an Illicit Encounters spokesperson said: “We all know about his brash persona, but the latest series of Diddly Squat has shown he can tug at heartstrings too – and clearly his farmer look continues to set hearts racing.”

We’re sure this all means nothing to Clarkson, whose relationship with model Lisa Hogan looks as strong as ever in series three of Clarkson’s Farm, but it’s far from the first time he’s sent hearts fluttering: a running gag in the early days of Top Gear was him and co-presenters James May and Richard Hammond regularly appearing near the top of various ‘weird crush’ polls. He’s at least probably pleased to have been upgraded from ‘weird’.