8 Benefits Of Being A Car-Loving Singleton

When I showed you the 10 ways that you know your girlfriend is becoming a car girl, many of you singletons (#foreveralone) had to look up the term ‘girlfriend’ in the dictionary. It seems, then, that many of you only have eyes for one love, and that comes with four wheels and ICE. But what exactly are the benefits of being a single petrolhead?

1. Weight reduction

Less weight in the car (even by 55kg) means better power-to-weight and improved fuel economy!

2. More money for car parts

Forget buying flowers when you forget to do the washing up! When you’re single, you can live like a pig AND pay for necessary upgrades.

3. You can drive how you want, when you want

With an empty car, you’re free to drive as fast as you like (within the speed limit, of course), when you want. No “baby slow down, I feel sick” when you’re single.

4. Reduced risk of pregnancy means roadster fun

Being single means that your chances of becoming a mother or father are greatly reduced. This means that you’re able to enjoy rear-wheel drive two-seater cars for longer.

5. Single people have MOAR time

Being single means that you don’t have to wait for ages while your significant other finishes her (or his) grooming. More time means that you’re not rushing when you’re driving somewhere. If you’re not rushing, you’re less likely to get busted for speeding.

TL;DR - having a girlfriend gets you speeding tickets.

6. You're always in control

If you’re a controlling partner, the chances are high that you’ll be interfering in your loved one’s driving habits. Eliminate this problem by being single. The same applies to heater controls and music…

7. You don't have to deal with hair!

She sure is pretty, but when she gets out of the car, you can bet your left nut that she’ll have left a few of her flowing golden locks on the seat. Amazingly, said hair is extremely hard to extract. This means that even more time is wasted in your life. Not to mention wasted money for electricity to vacuum.

8. You get to drive wherever the hell you like

People with partners have to make detours all the damn time. “Take me here, can we quickly go there…” Single folk don’t need to behave like taxi drivers. They get to drive wherever the hell they like. Even at home!