8 Ways You Can Easily Spot Non-Petrolheads

1. People who buy a car that they don't look back at

As the saying goes: ‘if you’ve bought a car that you don’t look back at when you walk away, then you’ve bought the wrong car.’

2. Drivers who don't know how to work one of these

Drivers who have never learned to operate a manual gearbox have never really experienced the joy of driving. Nailing the perfect gear change on a mountain pass is one of the greatest things known to man.

3. People who ask who Chris Harris is

If you need to ask, then you’re either five years old or you’re not into cars. Only one of these has an excuse not to know who Monkey Harris is.

4. A person who's never owned/wanted to own an Alfa

If you believe Clarkson, then you’ll know that to be a bona fide petrolhead, you’ll have to have owned an Alfa Romeo at some point. We’ll modify that a little bit and say that you’ll have to have wanted to own an Alfa at some point. Let’s face it, they’re wholly unreliable and we’re not made of money!

5. The entire marketing team at Golla bags

Unless this 911 has undergone a massive transformation, then that bag is not going to fit without a struggle.

6. People who don't love driving at all times

There are exceptions (like being in the wrong car and stuck in traffic), but you’ll generally find that petrolheads will find any excuse to jump in their car to go for a drive. People who don’t love cars become distracted easily.

7. Someone who doesn't acknowledge your awesome car

Anyone who owns a cool or rare car will spot a non-petrolhead easily because he or she will look at your ride without emotion. People who love cars will look it up and down, and will acknowledge your choice with either a smile, thumbs up or a chat.

8. Those who give up what truly makes them happy

Only true petrolheads will sacrifice hot food and clean water to have their dream car. Selling a Honda S2000 because of high insurance costs, then replacing it with a 1.2-litre VW Polo is unacceptable and should be punishable by death or immediate firing.