Driving A Hilariously Bad Hire Car Was A Weirdly Enjoyable Experience

Examining the filthy car in front of me, it didn’t take long to notice the way the bonnet didn’t quite fit flush with the bumper. That was probably something to do with the next thing I noticed: the bumper was horribly deformed. This set the tone for the rest of the car, which had damage of some description on pretty much every panel.

This poor Fiat Linea (essentially a Grande Punto with a boot, built in Turkey specifically for developing markets) I’d hired to explore south west Turkey had clearly led an arduous life, but its poor condition was just the start of my issues: with a 1.3-litre, 89bhp diesel engine under the ill-fitting hood, progress would be laboured to say the least. But you know what? I really enjoyed driving the thing.

Certainly not because under all the dirt, dents and scrapes laid a hidden gem of a car; quite the contrary. The ride and handling in particular were hilariously bad. Sure, you don’t expect suspension sophistication in a car like this, but the way the car never stopped jiggling around was concerning, making me convinced that past abuses meant some of the suspension components where either badly worn or even a bit broken.

Then there’s the soggy turn-in to consider, and the way it leaned and flopped around rather alarmingly whenever I had the audacity to take a corner or roundabout at anything resembling a reasonable speed. And as expected, getting up to those reasonable speeds required working the agricultural 1.3-litre diesel lump ridiculously hard.

The reason I enjoyed it was because of its rubbishness. The cars I’m fortunate enough to drive and test - even at the cheaper end of the scale - are almost always accomplished and very capable, making going completely the other way to something utterly basic and worn out a weirdly enjoyable experience. Trying to maintain as much speed as possible in the absence of power; leaning the car onto its door handles at the slightest provocation; having no gadgets or gizmos to distract you; it’s a refreshing change.

More than that, being given the keys to a car after relying only on local public transport unlocked so many more options as to where I could go, bringing with it a sense of freedom much like that which I experienced when I first got my driving license. It was a welcome reminder that even at its most basic and dilapidated, the motor car is a marvellous machine.