Gumball 3000 LIVE: The Journey Begins

8am: And so it begins. I’ve managed to cram in a few hours’ sleep (pretty hard to do given the excitement of having our own team in the Rally) and packed lightly so we have more room for merchandise, camera equipment and… a huge bloody spare tyre (one rear, fairly-shagged 305/30/20 rear in case you were wondering).

Gabz – my co-pilot for the Dublin to London leg – arrives in his 330Ci and starts filling the boot with CT caps, keychains and t-shirts. And then we stand back, and laugh, because even though it’s been a few days, we still haven’t come to terms with the ridiculousness of this wrap.

If you haven’t seen it by now (where have you been hiding?) our mighty monster for the 2016 Gumball Rally is the EmojiTR – essentially my Stage 4.25 GT-R with an eye-catching (or is that eye-watering?) emoji wrap containing all your most-used keyboard friends.

We jump in and set Google Maps for Holyhead in Wales, where we’re boarding a ferry for 2pm. It’s my turn to drive first, so I do what most GT-R owners do; point the car in a straight line, and stamp on the loud pedal.

With the Armytrix exhaust off, there’s still a trumpety vibe from the V6 but it’s not loud enough to be annoying on the boring British motorways.

The EmojiTR is proving to be a huge head-turner; nearly every person we pass cranes their neck to get a better look, and we’re met with smiles and phones taking pics. We stop off halfway up the M6 at a McDonalds for a cheeky break and a drink for the old girl – the GT-R is averaging about 23mpg which is actually kind’ve surprising, given that I normally see around 15mpg on my normal local ‘cruises’.

We’re about an hour away from Holyhead and now’s the time to make up some ground and make sure we get to the ferry on time. Armytrix exhaust ‘ON’, turn up the boost via the cruise control buttons and stamp on the loud pedal. And loud it certainly is!

This tuned GT-R also has one party trick – pops and bangs mode. A couple of button presses and I’m now in ‘Tune 1’. I make my way up to 4,500rpm, let off the throttle, and then gently feather it back on. POP. POP. BANG. POP.

I’m going to get an ASBO.

We make it to Holyhead on time with ringing ears. We bump into some of the Gumball 3000 crew, stop to allow some young kids to jump in the hotseat of the car and take some pics, then crawl onto the ferry. Maximillion Cooper (Gumball 3000’s Founder) is here with his wife Eve, so we stop for a quick chat and admire the two cars side-by-side – he’s rocking an Aston Martin Vanquish for the trip.

Next stop, Dublin…